5. For example, if someone told you your friends was talking negatively about you, is it possible that this isn’t true? If you really can’t stand to see another ad again, then please consider supporting our work with a contribution to wikiHow. Maintain a distant stance from your own emotions in the meantime in order to reduce the likelihood that you will take something she says personally and react emotionally. New plays. I also spend heaps of time with my boyfriend when I can. When there are different people so exists different opinions, if you have an argument with your best friend about some topic there are steps you should follow to resolve the issue and be friends like before In order to analyze the issue, it can be helpful to identify what led to the issue and what happened afterwards. How can I seem like the bigger person when resolving an argument with a teacher or adult? Talk to your friend,over a meal or dinner or something.Tell him/her how you feel,what do you think you both should do to resolve this argument.This method is very much like Solution 2.It may be easy to say your sorry but make sure you mean it! Arguing isn’t necessarily a bad thing in a friendship. What should I do when someone is in an argument and I can't find ways to resolve it because the person always ends up finding something to say against that? Just talk them. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 30,860 times. What do I do if the fight has been going on for a long time? When they're not ready for that, you can still reach out by texting—just make sure your message is actually communicating what you want to say. Talk with the other person about avoiding swear words or name calling. There are 17 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. of 3: Analyze possible solutions and agree on one option that fits for the both of you. However, you'll still want to talk things out in person eventually in order to … Don’t say something like, "I might have been wrong, but you made it worse. Even the best of friends argue sometimes. They aren't always pretty, but … Working Things Out. It usually leaves the conversation with nowhere to go. So now is the time to be your own best friend. All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 52,587 times. Don’t compromise too much. Gather some ideas about what hurt your feelings or made the situation more difficult for you. If you just hide, it'll make the situation more awkward than it already is. Once you have come to this conclusion, you can agree on what you both can do differently in the future. "When a friend does something that really upsets me or hurts my feelings, I first count to 10 to see if it's still bothering me. Healthy arguing about heavy stuff can help you grow closer as friends, but dumb arguments may just show that you’re so comfortable in your friendship you know you can tease and fight about stupid things without it ending your relationship. Sometimes friends need a break from one another in order to re-assess the situation and get some clarity. You can also try to listen to music to calm down and focus on processing your emotions. Learn more... Maybe you've just had a big blow out with your spouse, or a minor tiff with a friend or family member. Are you okay with that? These may work for you too, if you apply them wholeheartedly: 1. This could be as simple as an apology and an acknowledgement that you made a mistake or are cultivating a bad habit like using your smartphone at the dinner table. By using our site, you agree to our. The issue could be identified in a simple statement like: “When you use your smartphone at dinner, it bothers me,” or “It makes me uncomfortable when you talk about my mother like that.”. If you haven’t talked to your friend in a while, try texting or calling her to set up a time to meet. If they continue, then consider locks. Allow for space. Meditate So now is the time to be your own best friend. If they choose to sever their relationship with you over something so frivolous, they are probably not the kind of people you need in your life anyway. You may need one or two days to calm down and see the situation from a more objective point of view. Please help us continue to provide you with our trusted how-to guides and videos for free by whitelisting wikiHow on your ad blocker. Avoid folding your arms over your chest or rolling your eyes. It's okay to express your feelings. In fact, science has shown that the old adage, “don't go to bed angry” proves true, so don't settle for holding a grudge or withholding your forgiveness, and instead go to bed or leave the discussion with a strong sense of reconciliation and resolution. Clarke Sanders/Unsplash. I don't mean "you wore my shirt and spilled red wine on it" or "you ate the leftovers I was looking forward to all day" fights. You can write down your feelings in a journal or diary. Never call your friend names or use physical threats or violence. My friends all think I used them for a girl, but I didn't, and they have been annoyed at me for weeks. Planning to Fix the Situation. Discuss each side of the situation. Perhaps make a list of options where both parties involved would work on something. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. For example, focus on using transitions in your sentence with a phrase like “at the same time”, instead of “but”. It is okay to disagree with your friends sometimes, and argue or debate about a topic. What do I do? How can I fix it? of 4: wikiHow is a “wiki,” similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. If you do this, the adult/teacher will respect you for your maturity. What should I do? Subtle subversive: tends to avoid confrontation and often hints at problems through silence, nagging or whining.The problem is often the long build-up that develops before an argument breaks out. What should I do? If an argument does reach a high 10 on the anger scale, and things are said that you or the other person will likely regret saying later, it's important to think about how this conflict will affect your relationship with this person. Use “I statements,” such as, “I felt angry when I heard you were talking bad about me to other people.” Make sure you emphasize how you feel instead of what the other person did; you should always state your feelings first in order to reduce the likelihood that the other person will react emotionally or take it personally. I got into a fight with my friend, because I was not studying for my exam. She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. Method 2 Focus on being cooperative and helping the other person. You can say, "I think it would be better if we talk about this in person. Listen to her point of view, and then explain how you feel. You can walk away from anyone else you argue with, but you stay with your BFF and fix it. I have told them that it's spiteful but they don't care, how do I get them to listen to me and solve our issues? You could say something like, "Hey. Seeking a deeper understanding of the other person's point of view will allow you both to move forward towards a resolution. For example, if you struggle with your friend's smartphone at the table during dinner, suggest limiting their smartphone use to before or after dinner. By using our site, you agree to our. Think about all of the specifics of the situation. Of course, this is a two way conversation, so the other person should also be willing to take responsibility for their actions and words, and apologize for responding angrily. By signing up you are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy. Do not involve other people as this can seem like you are ganging up on your friend; talk to your friend individually. Look for ways to resolve the conflict. How can I stop an ongoing arguments and meanness between my friends? Last Updated: September 5, 2019 Working Towards a Resolution 1. How do I make someone stop arguing with the rest of my friends? Maintain eye-contact that is comfortable, look away every once in a while, then regain eye-contact. I have a really great friend who i see every weekend and try to see during the week. As well, discuss the importance of not cutting each other off or interrupting each other. If you wait too long to speak with your friend again the problem could grow. However, do not let it go on for more than that. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. I have had a major falling out with non blood relatives who constantly use my shed and trailer without asking. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/bb\/Resolve-an-Argument-Step-1-Version-4.jpg\/v4-460px-Resolve-an-Argument-Step-1-Version-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/bb\/Resolve-an-Argument-Step-1-Version-4.jpg\/aid3587549-v4-728px-Resolve-an-Argument-Step-1-Version-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":"728","bigHeight":"546","licensing":"